There is nothing new about calls to prove your patriotism. Before all these idiotic new ones, there was the original, primal one that every east Indian would know. If you are from Bengal or Odisha and had moved to Delhi, no matter how many lifetimes back, you will walk into this question so many times that they can act as milestones for your life.
Do you love puchka/gupchup or have you converted to golgappas?
You see, if your answer is in favour of the first, you are still a simple, good hearted person unchanged by the big city. It also implies that you are kind to animals and old people, children can be left alone with you, you are respectful to elders and you are perfect marriage material – trustworthy and unflinching. The way our culture puts a woman’s izzat you know where, the east Indian values are all summed up in a gupchup.
If by any chance, you seem undecided or say that you don’t dislike the golgappa all that much, you are the mcbc that all delhiwallas are. There is no middle path, either you are with puchka or against it. Take your side, because this is war.
You would think there would be many sitting comfortably on the fence, not true, to be honest. I am one, though. I think the golgappa is like a summer fruit, it’s like watermelon but way more complex, it’s like a mango out of the fridge but way more interesting, it’s mild and juicy like a lichi and cool like a melon. It loves you and it says it, sitting next to you and holding your hand.
The puchka/golgappa is like that violent abusive lover that we just can’t let go of. it’s addictive and enslaving and has a powerful influence. You know, there are times when you have miss it like that kick in the stomach, that punch in the throat, very powerful feelings. It loves you and tells you so after dragging you through the drawing room and breaking a few furnitures on the way.
Both are eminently lovable. If one came out as good, the other bad, that was not my intent. Both are unique human beings, equal and valuable. We should stop asking for that patriotism test and let people be in an open relation with both, love one more than the other or maintain a secret affair with one while proclaiming commitment to the other.
Live and let live.